So today is/was (depending on when you read this) my birthday. There was no excitement no parties and no liquor just me, my mind and my thoughts. I didn’t want to do celebratory things just because I honestly didn’t feel I had much to celebrate besides life and I thank Jesus daily for that.
What I wanted to do and did was reflect on the past year and make opportunities for the future year. I thought about how one year ago today I was at work bawling (so serious it was a first and last) about how the situation I was in was not my life. I mean literally in the office repeatedly saying, “this isn’t my life, this is not suppose to be my life”. Yet after that day I changed nothing. The most I did was change jobs and Lord knows that was needed. But when it came to dreams, goals and aspirations I did nothing to change my life.
Now I am 24 and I know I got to change things about myself because I refuse to let a dream die inside of me. REFUSE! I been watching #basedgodoprah and she has been talking about being a better you and having the faith of mustard seeds. Things we all know and learned as kids but they never quite made since until now.
She said to stop throwing pity parties about your past so that you can grow and stop blaming others for your failures. She told me (yep we be talking) to stop listening to what others feel I should do with my life and do what I want. I really wish she was around in my teens, I would not have ended up in school but I digress. She just gave me so many “Aha moments” as she calls them and I made the vow that everyday I will write, go to my lessons regularly, I will make contacts and network until I get to where I want to be.
I see my peers doing so much and yes we all have that little voice that sometimes says, “look at you, you ain’t shit and you haven’t accomplished anything with your life.” But that voice will be no more for me. I will no longer look at them and become depressed because I am not where I want to be but instead let it motivate me to work harder.
And I decided today was the perfect day to let the old Je’Tara go and start completely over since I started a new year. There is no reason my dreams should die inside of me. No reason. I’m going to live my best life now! And I am going to work like I never did before. I’ll be damned if I live the rest of my life working for someone else 9-5. And I am going back to something I used to tell my best friend all the time, “Nigga I ain’t meant to work no 9-5 because I am extraordinary not ordinary”.
*drops mic* I’m Out!
Happy B’day Je’Tara!!!
Happy bday babe..glad you’re back and I’m excited for your future