Black Designer Labels

 Sigh, did you really think I was talking about clothes? It’s about the labels that are often put on us as black women. A woman in general deals with so much being said or done to her but I feel like there are times when we deal with more. What are black designer labels? Bitch, hoe, slut, trick, chicken head, Becky and so many others names that continue to degrade us. My question is to you; why do you continue to let him put you down like that? Even when I was in my teen years, I knew that being called out of my name is not something I was willing to put up with. 

Now I will admit I fell into the trap of letting my “homegirls” call me Bitch or hoe but once I got older, I realized if you let your friends call you out your name, why not let him? So I got to the point where no one will label me as less than my worth. See, I know a few women may come on here and feel that there is no harm in it. But it is. It’s saying to men it’s okay for you to talk down to me. It’s okay for you to embarrass me by labeling me as just a piece of trash.

I know with the generation we are in today, females tend to call each other these “labels” and feel they are uplifting each other. Ladies, what you don’t realize is, he is watching and listening to everything you do and say. So when he hears you and your friends throwing these words around, he begins to feel that it’s okay for him to throw them around also. These words are not innocent! Why? Because, what if you and him are comfortable tossing around these words to each other in private, then you go out somewhere and make him angry and he throws it at you in front of several people. Do you still feel the same about it being an innocent word? Do you still feel that it’s no big deal? What if a woman, who is not your friend, decides to call you one of the labels out of anger, then is it still so innocent?

So do you guys see what I am saying? Or at least get where I am going with this? These words are not only painful but they are keeping us down as black women. They are letting people outside our race continue to degrade us or feel we are not intelligent, beautiful women because of what they are hearing come out of our mouths. What we say to each other has some serious affects in our lives. Now I see women calling themselves a Bitch. Ma’am where are you going? Not only are you putting yourself down but you are opening the door for another Gucci Mane song to be named after you. Sigh, I won’t even get on the music that continue to use these words. I fell into that trap too! I thought it was okay for a rapper to say women are bitches and hoes. Why? Because my excuse like so many others was, if he is not directing it towards me then why should I care. I care now! It’s not right for them but eventuallly they will stop once we do. Stop going around saying you are a BOSS BITCH. Just go and be a boss. It’s okay to be great without the ugly label.

Don’t expect respect from anyone, especially a man! A real man or woman would not let these words come out their mouths about others. They would know that when you are intelligent, you can find more mature words to use besides Bitch or hoe. I always feel there is a lack of respect, vocabulary and just pure ignorance to the harm you are causing when you say these words. So, I know I am going to probably get some backlash from this but I feel it’s time to let these “labels” go. We have others but you know I will have a part two right?



10 thoughts on “Black Designer Labels

  1. You know what? I was always uncomfortable when women used bitch affectionately, I’d laugh of course but its not something that is exactly liberating.what hit my spirit about this post was when you brought up that men take our lead when we give ourselves those derogatory labels…deep

    • Thank You Goddess!! Yeah, I noticed they take our lead in EVERYTHING!! I will be doing a post similar to what you just said. Those words are never affectionate. I won’t us to learn we can find other things to say about ourselves!! I am awaiting your return!!!

  2. So I’m watching The Game & I laugh when I’m suppose to, I get the message when I’m suppose to & I get choked up (Tear) when I’m suppose to. However, anytime any of the women refer to the other as a bitch, I look for them to call her out, slap her or at least speak with a glance, of course that never happens. I never explored what it was I was feeling or what that uncomfortableness was but your post puts it in perspective. Very nice thought provoking post.

    • Thank You Mr. Tramuel! (I added you to my blogroll ;0) But yeah I kept hearing women use these words as a sign of affection or just making them beautiful when honestly these are very negative words. I feel like, (yes I know you are a man so don’t be offended.) men pay attention to everything we do. So if I call my homegirl a “Bitch” and her bf hears it, he may feel it’s okay. I never knew why I would feel uncomfortable either, like I tense up when I hear women say these words to each other! Thank You for commenting and hopefully I write another post you like!

  3. This was a great post. I agree with nearly all of what you said.

    All I would add is that the focus shouldn’t just be on black women, but ALL women.

    Also, I think we all should expect people to respect us. You have to hold people to a high standard sometimes to let them know that you are serious and that you will not stand for being called out of your name or disrespected.

    I really wish more people were aware of their worth. That would put an end to a lot of the madness that occurs in our society today. It’s like respect, value & worth fall on deaf ears now.

    But I believe that one day things will change…and I pray that they change for the better.

    • Oh I agree ALL women should stop but my focus for the moment is black women. I believe in having respect until it’s lost. Some people have a hard time getting respect because they let the craziest things come out there mouths. I think things will change for the good one day also! Thanks for commenting!

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