20 thoughts on “Still Black Still Single

  1. Still Puerto Rican…Still Single,

    I loved your post I saw that same show and thought it was ridiculous. In this day and age why does anyone want to perpetrate the idea that if you are a black women or man you can only date inside the black race. Does that mean that I should only date Latino men?

    The truth is that there are a lot of single women out there of all colors. Women are expecting more from their partners than in the 1950’s. And it’s about time.

    We just need all the wonderful single men out there to step upto the plate and become partners rather than trying to find a mommy figure they can have sex with, lol.

    keep on writitng



    • HAHA yes my Puerto Rican sister!!! I am so happy someone of another race/ethnicity see my point. You touched on something that I really like and that’s the fact that women expect more now than they did in the 1950’s. That is so true. I think that is why a lot of women (regardless of color) are not settling for just whatever. Why should we? Girl I gotta visit your blog I feel a connection to you right now. Yes I want a partner and not just a mate. Lets meet halfway or something. Steve is pushing us back into the fifties.

  2. “Y’all I’m like one of those women who keep saying she is done but never stops talking. LOL”

    And dont you dare stop. I’m sick of this topic too. I’m also sick of ppl tryna hook me up. Its like when I am involved w someone they want to be all up in my biz when I’m single they want to be all up in my biz….ugh!
    I am well aware that there is no man in my life but there are so many benfits to being single and I’m really starting to appreciate myself more than ever. I can get up and go whenever i want. I can talk to whoever the hell I want. I dont have to consider anyone before making plans but myself.
    I dont want it to be like this forever but man I’m not complaining.
    I have so much inner work to do before I can truly comit to someone. Until then dating is cool.

    • I won’t stop since you told me not to. The thing that annoys me the most about all these open forums is the fact that they are unbalanced. Each time they touch this topic it’s negative. I don’t feel uplifted or better about my situation once it’s over. Like Mr. T said it’s hidden agendas. They all are selling something. No one really cares if I ever marry or not.

  3. I’m so glad you wrote t!his.

    “White media still think they better than us I see… Yes that’s how I feel everytime they do a “CASE STUDY ON US NI**ERS”

    I’m black, but I’ve never been a woman, so I can’t speak on how a single black female feels but having the revolution televised by those who don’t either is insulting. How many wives has Steve Harvey had? Who is Hill Harper dating? been married too? … c’mon, I’ll wait. Seems like that panel all had their own agenda. Steve Harvey? Really? What did that conversation sound like? ABC: “Hey Steve we need somebody of colour to bring all ya’ll ninja’s to the yard” Steve: “Okay, as long as I can push my wack book & get a few of my other friends to push their agenda.” ABC: “Great!” ABC hangs up: “Dumb coon said yes.”

    I’ont wanna study war no mo’

    • Steve has been married one too many times. Hill is still single. So I was confused as to why they felt they could tell me how to get my relationships right. I thought that also Mr. T, I felt they all had their own agendas and they only did it because of what they could gain. LOL at the ABC convo.

      Dumb COON!!!

    • EXACTLY. I was hoping someone would point out those two facts about the panel’s male ‘experts’. Neither one of those fools can manage to keep a woman….

      • Right and that is what bothered me the most. No one has a relationship but Steve and he has had how many wives? Yeah okay… So I just wish the convo on this would end itself or self destruct. Thank you for commenting!!

  4. Love It!!! Love IT!! Yes, some women choice to be single. Having a man isn’t our main focus!!

    I have a shirt that says “Explain to me again, why I NEED A MAN??” Men came up trying to explain to me…I was like “uh no, I don’t need you…becuz everything you ofter I can get for myself…they do make plastic dicks…lmao!!”

    I don’t need one, sure I would like one, but it will never be that serious.

    F*** Steve!!!

    • Girl I need that shirt. They act like we are walking around sad because we are single. Honey some of us are enjoying the ride. I wish Steve would just quit!!! I do. he is making my foot hurt and that’s not good!!!

      • Aww poor baby…I got in NYC last summer…sorry I sure should’ve brought some and sold them…lol

  5. I have been single for nearly all of my 21 years of existance and I’ve never had a problem with it, until I got involved with social networking. For some reason, the media tricks us into believing something that we would otherwise believe to be untrue. I’ve only had one relationship and that lasted 4 months. Being single has taught me that I can stand on my own two feet and perfect my individuality, while gaining self-independence. Now, there is nothing wrong with relationships, but make sure that you know yourself before getting into one. Don’t lose your identity because of society’s definition of happiness.

    • That is a great way to look at it. They trick us into believing it’s wrong. I have been single all my life also and honestly by choice. Social networks can add to the foolishness that the media already has out. Did you see the special? If not they all made it to be a bad thing for some reason. Like if you are 30 and single you are failing at life. It was horrible. I am happy I know that being alone is okay and sometimes best because you learn more about yourself in the process.

  6. Yeah, it can be the best thing in a process for learning about oneself for real. I think that people who think it is so awful are mostly those who have spent all of their life in the shadow of someone else. It’s like the relationship becomes you instead of vice versa. I am glad that I didn’t engage in any relationships when i was younger. I wouldn’t have been able to contribute anything mentally, spiritually or financially. The odds would have been totally against me. But there is nothing wrong with being single and learning to love yourself, then applying that to another person, if and when you do enter into a relationship.

  7. I know Im late, but I dont get a lot of time to make comments sometime…

    being a happily married black man, with a beautiful black queen by his side, I definitely have to say having a relationship is a GREAT thing! HOWEVER, like MissJ10 pointed out earlier:

    “Being single has taught me that I can stand on my own two feet and perfect my individuality, while gaining self-independence… make sure that you know yourself before getting into [a relationship]”

    I have been a HUGE supporter of know yourself BEFORE you commit to being in a relationship! Otherwise, discovering yourself while you’re in a relationship can be DISASTROUS to what you built with that person!

    I also feel that people unsuccessful in relationships, DEFINITELY SHOULD NOT be offering up advice to anyone! That’s like Evil Knievel (the 70’s stuntman that spent more time broken up in the hospital than driving his motorcycle or cars) teaching teens how to drive safely! SMH! It just don’t make sense!

    I am glad some people see through Steve’s nonsense!

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